Self-Compassion: Vital nourishment for our growth, success & INNER STRENGTH?
Habit formation via repetition & reinforcement is key to the pursuit of goals. That’s what enables us to operate from a zone of unconscious competence. But it’s also true that obstacles, setbacks, and failures are part of the journey. Be it lifestyle changes or pursuit of other forms of goals & outcomes in life, our real growth often happens in these trying circumstances.
How well do we treat ourselves while we navigate tough terrain? Do we (unwittingly at times) tend to become our most unsparing critics, hoping it makes us battle-hardened? In the process, are we undermining our own chances while we attempt to rise from the ashes?
I was telling a friend recently that Self Compassion is the YIN to the YANG in Self Esteem when it comes to living a life of growth, happiness, fulfillment and sustainable success. In an emerging social context that celebrates achievement orientation, talk about “wishy-washy” ideas like Self Compassion can often make people uncomfortable.
But it’s important we get over this discomfort, and that too pretty soon. Practicing self-compassion is akin to preparing the soil with the right nutrients for the best crop possible.
The soil here really is our unconscious mind, which is the seat of unconscious competence after all! That’s where our repeated actions get crystallized as powerful habits. If the soil isn’t quite right, don’t we need to rectify that?
Listen to this inspiring & highly informative talk by Dr. Kristin Neff, an American academic who has done solid research in the area of self-compassion. Lot of tips and perspectives that are very useful. Please do check it out during the weekend.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rUMF5R7DoOA
A powerful takeaway from Dr. Neff’s talk is that self-compassion is what enables you to actually emerge strongest from a crisis or failure!
Also, there are many good resources (including self assessment tools) at the following URL:
